If  you really want something in this life,
You have to work for it !
Now I have to go, they’re about to announce
The Lottery Numbers !!

A teacher asked Little Johnny:
What is the full form of Maths ?
Little Johnny answered:
Mentally Affected Teachers Harassing Students !!

When I like to get in touch with my feminine side,
I go to the bar and order Bloody Mary !!

Friendship is like pissing your pants !
Everyone can see it, But only you can feel it’s  true warmth !!
Thank you for being the piss in my pants !!!

Beer in His Pocket…!

A drunk was staggering home with 2 cans of beer in
his pocket when he slipped and fell heavily.
Struggling to his feet, he felt something wet running
down his leg.
Please, God, he implored : Let it be blood !!

One False Move…!

Love is Like a Game of Chess ! 
One False Move and You’re Mated !!
 

Quit Smoking…!

Quit Smoking is the easiest thing in the world. 
I have done it dozens of times !!
 

Teach Patience to Young…!

Avoid Hangovers…!

If Evolution Were True…!

The only True Wisdom…!

You and Your Boss…!

The Formula _A = X + Y + Z_ ...!

Money Can’t Buy Happiness…!

Make Sure it’s Worth Watching…!

If Work is so Terrific…!

Take a Lesson…!

Everyone is Gifted…!

Dear IRS…!

Three Ages of Marriage…!