Humorous Dispassionate is my way to meet new friends from all over the World and try to put Funny Quotes, Sayings, and Proverbs in a different way so have fun, keep Smiling and Feel Free to Comment on my Entries...! Alsanda
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Walk & Talk ..!
Children You spend the first two years of
their life teaching them to walk and talk.
Then you spend the next 16 years
telling them to sit down and be quiet...!
Friday, May 30, 2008
Dental Records ...?
I can't understand how they identified the
air crash victims by their Dental Records,if
they don't know who you are, how do they
know who your Dentist is ???
air crash victims by their Dental Records,if
they don't know who you are, how do they
know who your Dentist is ???
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
How Long a Minute ...!
How Long a Minute it Depends on what
Side of the Bathroom Door you're on !!!
Side of the Bathroom Door you're on !!!
Friday, May 23, 2008
Here's to ME...!
Here's to you and Here's to me, and I hope we Never Disagree.
But, if that should ever be, to HELL with You, Here's to ME !!!
But, if that should ever be, to HELL with You, Here's to ME !!!
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Obituaries...!
At my age I do what a wise man did. I get my daily paper,
look at the Obituaries page and if I'm not there I carry on as usual !!!
look at the Obituaries page and if I'm not there I carry on as usual !!!
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Friday, May 16, 2008
In Common…!
The Magician and the Politician have much in Common:
they both have to draw our attention away from what
they are really Doing !!!
they both have to draw our attention away from what
they are really Doing !!!
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
What is SEX ???
An 8-year-old girl went to her dad, who was working in the garage. Daddy, what is sex The father was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decided that if she was old enough to ask the question, then she was old enough to get a straight answer. He proceeded to tell her all about the 'birds and the bees. When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open. did you ask that question, honey? Mom told me to tell you that dinner would be ready in just a couple of SECS.
The Formula _A = X + Y + Z_ ???
If A equals Success, then the Formula is _A = X + Y + Z_.
X is Work.Y is Play. Z is Keep your Mouth Shut !!!
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Criticize Someone ...!
Before you Criticize Someone, walk a Mile in their Shoes,
That way, you'll be a mile from them and you'll have their Shoes !!!
That way, you'll be a mile from them and you'll have their Shoes !!!
Water and Land ...!
As the Earth is 2/3 Water and 1/3 Land,
it is clear that our time should be divided.
2/3 Fishing and 1/3 Work.
it is clear that our time should be divided.
2/3 Fishing and 1/3 Work.
POLITICIANS …!
Ninety six percent of the politicians give the other four percent
a bad reputation !
Political language is designed to make lies sound truthful and
murder respectable, and to give an appearance of solidity to
pure wind !
Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the
tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel !
Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build bridges
even when there are no rivers !
Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians
seriously and the politicians as a joke !
Monday, May 12, 2008
New Survey…!
Someone has come out with a New Survey ; Apparently,
Three Out of Every Four People Make up 75 Percent of
the Population ??????
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Life is Short ...!
Life is Short ,
Don't waste time worrying about what people think of you !!!
Don't waste time worrying about what people think of you !!!
Beer Consumption ...!
The FDA is considering additional Warnings on Beer and Alcohol
Bottles, such as:
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you are
whispering when you are not.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing
like an asshole.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the
same boring story over and over again until your friends want
to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay
shings like thish.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe
that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at
4 in the morning.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering
what the hell happened to your pants.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over
in the morning and see something really scary (whose species
and or name you can't remember).
WARNING: consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of
inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may create the illusion
that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really,
really big guy named Thor.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe
you are invisible.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people
are laughing WITH you.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause an disruption in the
space-time continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps
of time may seem to "disappear."
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.
Friday, May 9, 2008
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)